acovie

Category: poetry

Avoidance

This island

Uncluttered

An illusion I’ve created

From a strained alliance

I can no longer confide

As if I ever truly could

This yearning, juvenile

An unrealistic ambition

Bringing me to this byroad

The serenity I’ve found

By circumvention

Is it real?

– ACovie

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Shadows & Sunshine

Shadows and Sunshine

I haven’t visited in some time
Likely out of fear
Fear for my reality
The changes
Painstakingly necessary
Undoubtedly unavoidable

This presence has frightened me
The in depth realism
To opening the gates
Again
To what was once bliss
No longer

Within the sunshine
Comes shadows
You can’t appreciate rays
Without some darkness
Oh how I’ve missed you
Warmth of my mind

I welcome your return
and acknowledge
You’ll again leave
and my avoidance
Will reestablish
Until my next awakening

-ACovie

Aspirations

I aspire
To inspire
Driven
To live in
A world that elevates
Negotiates
Logically and thoughtfully
Without ignorance
Or inference

Unafraid
To say
Taking the time
Before chiming in
To realize
Within words what actually lies

Understand
Outside dreamland
What’s real
Consider the depth
How people feel
With consideration
Of sensitivity
But reality
Of actuality

-ACovie

Now Is the Time

Am I a writer
Because I say I am?
What characteristics
qualify me
To be the image
I believe
To be

With vision
easily clouded
alternate perspectives,
Views, opinions

When is the line drawn
Between where we want to be
And where
others speculate

When do we stand up
For all that we are?

The answer
is now

– ACovie

Fluctuating Feelings

My direction is wavering
Although, this is not uncommon

I set a fire an old life
and planted seeds for a new one
Now I see trimmings are in order

This never ending cycle of growth
At times blissful
Others daunting

I wish I better understood my needs
My desires
I await the day the light bulb stops flickering
And glows continuously
The flame I chase may be out of reach,
but I continue to run towards it
I want so much
And nothing at all

I can never truly make up my mind
The blessing and curse that ensues

Now here I am
lying awake again
Questioning my every move

– ACovie

Contemplative Saturday

And what if I died, who would mind?
What would they think?
What thoughts would they believe
Of my character

Is the world’s perception
The same I have
Of myself?

-ACovie

Staggering

Tangled
Internally mangled
I broke my promise
I’ve been dishonest
My mind losing the conflict
My heart decided to inflict
Finding myself calculating
Waiting, than re-evaluating
This desire, is it legitimate?
I’m afraid to admit
The fear of not comprehending
A sought after ending
Consumed in fog
Thick, musty smog
Swept up from below
Started to let go
Now here I waver
At what I savor
Swinging at the fiction
Of previous convictions
As I digress
I wanted to express
Contemplating, debating
Appreciating
Exploring the intention
Evaluating the prevention
The barriers that emerge
With uncertain word
Seeking my point of evacuation
From my fear of relation
What is the strength?
Holding arms length
Or taking the fall
To potentially have it all
-ACovie

Untitled

Do you believe in this?
This undeniable bliss
Underlying emotion
Unspoken devotion
Is existence jaded?
Am I mentally sedated?
Apprehension subsided
In the case I’m misguided
At the edge of a high dive
Anticipating my soul revived
Dodging concerned projections
Results of these affections
Because wide open is terrifying
No need for denying
Exposing your soul
For another to know
To potentially be denied
Takes a toll on ones pride
Although, the reward greater
Finding your hearts translator
Worth the exposure
Of pure disclosure
Resisting tenacity
Offering my minds capacity
In hopes of return
A complementary yearn

-ACovie

Greatest Fear

DSC_1669 2

Resetting induces redefining
Instinctively combining
Rediscovering
While uncovering
Layers exclusive
Naturally elusive
Exposed from strain
Difficult to explain
The need to understand
What’s at hand
This opportunity
To find internal unity
To release
And make peace
With obstacles uncontrollable
Being consolable
Autonomously
It must be
The perfect storm
Stepping out of the norm
Waiting for the dust to clear
Or maybe that’s my greatest fear

-ACovie
Photo by ACovie

The Reset – Reality 

  
Reflective Saturday 

Reality, I’m here to stay 

Strolls through the city

Over which I’ve been so giddy 

This dream come true

So long overdue

Overwhelming sadness

Ideological madness

Verity in this decision

Pause in revision

The fast track

To all the boxes unpacked

Arrived at a standstill

Forced to absorb my fill

This decision I’ve shaped

My old life I’ve escaped

It’s authentic

Most moments virtually hallucinagenic

An elaborate cocktail

Of adventurous, anxious, brave, and frail 

No constant one second to the next

My introspection indefinitely complex

I cant disengage

This mental cage

This roller coaster of emotion

From what I’ve chosen

I wouldn’t change the circumstance

Accompanying this urban romance

Harnessing these feelings

Appreciating these dealings

For the day I reflect

And think, now what’s next?

-ACovie