Category: beginnings


My life has changed immensely in a short period of time.  What’s more wild is that I don’t even notice it 99% of the time.  Two years ago I was headed in a completely different direction from the place I sit now.  It really is unbelievable how each decision truly shapes your life.  You may not even know it when it is happening or realize until years later but every single decision you make impacts you eventually.

It’s simple, really.  It’s what you are told from childhood and throughout adulthood, but the ramifications are never apparent until you pause.

Take a pause.

When I reflect I recall hearts I broke, people who broke mine, days I thought would surely kill me, and a multitude of great memories.

As I sit here now I am so grateful.

I am grateful for my courage to listen to my intuitions no matter how long it took my heart and mind to agree.   I am grateful for every soul that has touched mine, negatively or positively.  I am grateful for change, for growth, for pain, and for happiness.  I am grateful to love and to be loved.

I am grateful to be alive.

I’ve said it many times and I will say it again,
cheers to change,
cheers to growth,
and cheers to being afraid.
Because at the end of the day it will all be worth it.



Shadows & Sunshine

Shadows and Sunshine

I haven’t visited in some time
Likely out of fear
Fear for my reality
The changes
Painstakingly necessary
Undoubtedly unavoidable

This presence has frightened me
The in depth realism
To opening the gates
To what was once bliss
No longer

Within the sunshine
Comes shadows
You can’t appreciate rays
Without some darkness
Oh how I’ve missed you
Warmth of my mind

I welcome your return
and acknowledge
You’ll again leave
and my avoidance
Will reestablish
Until my next awakening


End of Year Reflection


I can’t help but appreciate changes to the seasons and their inevitable reminder to reflect. Years end invokes the beauty of the trials, tribulations, and conquests the year has brought on.

Cheers to reflecting!


Late Night Thought X17

You have to learn to appreciate the long nights. Especially the ones followed by an early morning. The walks alone in a city that’s still foreign. The reality of being alone, figuring it out. Don’t lose sight of the moments. They are just that, moments. Brief elements of what makes up who we are, who we are becoming. 

Oh, I love the moments. I love this eye opening experience for everything it’s worth and the woman it’s making me become. 
I almost lost sight…


The Reset – Reality 

Reflective Saturday 

Reality, I’m here to stay 

Strolls through the city

Over which I’ve been so giddy 

This dream come true

So long overdue

Overwhelming sadness

Ideological madness

Verity in this decision

Pause in revision

The fast track

To all the boxes unpacked

Arrived at a standstill

Forced to absorb my fill

This decision I’ve shaped

My old life I’ve escaped

It’s authentic

Most moments virtually hallucinagenic

An elaborate cocktail

Of adventurous, anxious, brave, and frail 

No constant one second to the next

My introspection indefinitely complex

I cant disengage

This mental cage

This roller coaster of emotion

From what I’ve chosen

I wouldn’t change the circumstance

Accompanying this urban romance

Harnessing these feelings

Appreciating these dealings

For the day I reflect

And think, now what’s next?


Clarity Diet 


The End Of an Era

The end of an era is manifesting. The motions are in full swing to creating a refreshed being with proud battle wounds. Lacerations of that past are healing and the fresh scars are the most beautiful sight I’ve ever witnessed. The ramifications of what is occuring in my life right now will likely not fully make sense for quite some time, although, the horizon has a completely different view than it did just a short few weeks ago. 

When life really rattles you it’s hard to understand the true beauty in it. Moments of clarity begin to be that much more vivid. What really matters couldn’t make more sense and that is solely due to the trials and tribulations  and what surviving them truly means. 

The person I am today is still the same person I was yesterday and all of the day’s prior. The difference is that I am wiser, I am more stable, and I believe in myself more than ever. 

I attribute these things to the difficulties, to the challenges, and to the rock bottom moments. I also attribute them to the beautiful people that do exist in this world and in my life. My gratitude is inexpressible. 

I am forever grateful for the adversities, for the forced growth, and for all of the beautiful souls that helped me hold the pieces in place when I should have been falling apart. 

With love,

The end of an era… The beginning of a new life. 

Expansion Insight X2

Life’s about to become really uncomfortable. 

I secretly love discomfort. 

Cheers to the next chapter. 


New Preface, Offer Pending

Headphones in ears
Attempting to disappear
Consuming my salad
Writing a ballad
Centered in the kitchen
Full of ambition
Scents of diverse meals
Conversations lacking feels
Typical work day
Outward oddities on display
Relishing in these traits
Deeply appreciate
With no expectation of glory
Just telling my story
Simply present
In this being I represent
Absorbing all meaningful connection
Prepping the dissection
Defining all of these developments
My inner elements
Ebbs & flows
Of all I don’t know
Excitement and fear
What’s near?
The next step impending
New preface, offer pending